plastic bertrand

Due to my total inability to absorb any high school French, the English translation of Plastic Bertrand's wonderful 70's pop ditty "Ca Plane Pour Moi", became an intriguing mystery...

I believe I have finally found the perfect translation.

"Ca Plane Pour Moi"
Wham!Bam!Someone poured whiskey on my cat, Splash

And lit him

He went "boof"

While he was on my bed
I tried to put him out with a broom

My goitre problem got in the way (I sleep naked?)

Very quickly
OuchOuchOuchOuch
In four colours

Ey up!One morning

There's loot at my place

It's my shit wrapped in plastic

Horse's in fishnets

Spare a drop in one's mouth
It's a very grand beer dance

I like my beer in a big glass

And spew
OooOooOooOoo
Come on you Indians in your igloos
That's life for me

Repeat twice...
Me

Repeat four times...
That's life for me

Repeat twice...

Ey up!The mother

Is larger than a panel

What a vibration

And a voyage through passion
Be my dirty passenger

And ride in my lime Combi

You are King of the divan
OhOhOhOh
I'm King of the divan

That's life for me

Repeat twice...

Ey up!Occupy me

Touch my trinkets

Touch my little house plant

It's not today that I wish to talk of tambourines

Or the head of a mannequin
YeahYeahYeahYeah
That's life for me

Repeat thrice...

Ey up!My Nana's the best

She's bizzarre

Marry me

And carry my case

Lever me onto the bar

My life force will come for a grand cocktail
Oh yeah

YeahYeahYeah
Dance on the plate

That's life for me

My life for me

© Bonzai Culture Club

Plastic Bertrand (real name Roger Jouret) Had one massive hit in 1977 with "Ca Plane Pour Moi" and probably remains one of the most famous Belgians.

In his free time Plastic cultivated his secret passion for scrabble - he recently played the world champion and won and has secured a place on the panel of the Festival of Board Games.These days (when not scrabbling), Plastic keeps himself busy with his own art gallery, where he has hosted a show dedicated to bovine beauty.

He has also relaunched himself as a record producer promoting new talent alongside classical music from the 'Russia of the Tzars' (his mother is Ukranian).